Wednesday, January 5, 2011
It's The End Of The World As We Know It
I feel like someone's laughing at me. Oh, right, that's because someone is--my husband. He gets quite a kick out of watching me freak out over things that only happen in blockbuster movies. Until now...
See, I have a lot of fears, but I'm really only truly afraid of about three things: 1) vomiting 2) public humiliation and 3) the end of the world. Yup, I said it, and you can laugh all you want but when you're all blindsided by visitors from another planet, running and screaming for your lives, I'll be the one locked in an indestructible bunker with my tin foil hat and baby monitor. Who's laughing now, suckas?
Before you think I've truly lost my grip with reality, let me enlighten you on some recent events that might have you watching the skies for shiny round objects, if you haven't heard about them already. It's all over the news nationwide, so, it's real, and it's FREAKING ME OUT.
Fact 1: Some night last weekend (we can't remember exactly which night), Bill came home from somewhere and told me that on the way here he saw some crazy red and blue lights up over the airport. At first he assumed they were planes, but then they suddenly dipped super fast and started flying all over the place, way too fast for any airplane. He said it was crazy, he'd never seen anything like it. I didn't think too much of it until yesterday, when he said everyone's talking about them and no one knows what they were. I demanded to know who "everyone" was, because he likes to throw that term around and it usually means one or two guys he works with. But he said dj's on the radio station. Like, news, sort of. And the panic sets in.
Fact 2: It's all over the news, nationwide--mass amounts of animals are dropping dead and no one can tell why. It started on Dec. 30th, with 10,000 fish showing up dead on the banks of a river in Arkansas. Panic increasing. A day later, New Year's Eve, around 5,000 birds dropped dead out of the sky, their carcasses spread out over a mile radius. This was also in Arkansas, about 125 miles away from the fish. Panic really increasing. Then Monday, around 450 birds dropped dead out of the sky in Lousiana. An entirely different state. Panic approaching dangerous levels. And...just when I thought I couldn't handle anymore accounts of birds mysteriously dying for no apparent reason, today the news reported that last night in SWEDEN 50-100 birds fell dead, out of the sky, and no one knows why. Sweden. A different country. A DIFFERENT CONTINENT!!!
Each incident has everyone baffled, no one knows what's going on, no one can explain it, although of course, they've thrown out their "theories." Every "theory" has already been disproved, logically, if not evidently. Bottom line is, until they get the test results back from the dead birds and fish, which they say will hopefully be less than a week, they won't know.
Mysterious blue and red lights in the sky? Mass amounts of animals dropping dead for no apparent reason? Call me crazy (I know you're thinking it) but all I have going over and over in my head are scenes from Signs and War of the Worlds. Seriously, FREAKING OUT HERE. So, my beloved readers, our time together may be short, I just wanna say it's been a pleasure blogging with you. And no, there's no more room in my bunker.