Cyber Monday Giveaway!

So my aforementioned fabulous cousin Jen has agreed to do a Cyber Monday Giveaway of her new game, Trek to Zion.It's an LDS version of the popular game Ticket to Ride, that can be purchased here, or here (enter the code "free1130" to get free shipping from this store, today only) or if you're local, head on over to Far West Books. It would be a great Christmas present!

So all you need to do in order to enter the giveaway and win this awesome game is leave a comment on my blog telling me what your favorite Christmas song is cause I think that'd be fun. Then, to be able to enter again, you can link to this post on your blog or facebook (both will earn you two more entries in the giveaway) and come back and tell me you did. The winner will be announced Wednesday.

Spread the word, and good luck!

Trek to Zion

My cousin Jen is amazing. I've always known it, but now everyone else can see how amazing she is too. A little while ago Jen had a genius idea to turn a popular, fun game that she loves to play with her family (called Ticket to Ride, you may have played it) into a clever LDS (Mormon) version, called Trek to Zion. I've never played either, but I hear that if you love Ticket to Ride, you will love Trek to Zion.

So here is her creation--yes, she made this:






Doesn't it look super fun? I can't wait to play it! It is yours to purchase here, here, or if you're local, head on over to Far West Books. Perfect for a Christmas gift, too!

Still Here

So I have a goal to blog more. I miss it. It used to be such a big part of my life and I'm sad that I've let it slip by the wayside, along with many other things that used to be important to me. During this last big "dip" I've allowed myself to slip further and further into my comfort zone, letting things go, shutting myself up into my turtle shell and ignoring things that involve human interaction and expressing myself. Well, I'm working on ditching the shell and putting myself out there more like I used to. I'm working on healing, and getting back to the Alicia I used to be. My blog is an important step, to talk about the things that are still here, still important to me, defining my life at this point in time.

1.5 months. That's it. That's all I have left to finish my novel. Can you believe it? I can't. But I'm so excited. To think that in a month and a half I could be signing a contract, handing over my beloved manuscript to be published to the world, for you and everyone else to read. Am I nervous? A little, but nowhere near as much as I am excited. Although I haven't made as much progress over the last few months as I would have liked, I'm raring to finish this bad boy. I'm at a crucial part in the story right now, maybe the part I'm most excited about writing--the falling in love part, which leads to the twist part, the conflict part, and the dramatic ending part. Eek! I can hardly contain myself. I really hope you all love reading it as much as I love writing it. This story is so much a part of me.

Progress on my headaches is not so much progressing. I guess sometimes in order to find the solution you have to eliminate the non-solutions and things might get worse before they get better. The prescription the neuro put me on was a great diet pill, but a joke of a pain pill. Instead of preventing migraines as it was supposed to do, it created pressure in my forehead so intense it actually brought migraines on. Needless to say I stopped taking it. I am still plugging away at physical therapy, which rocks my world--while I'm there. 15 minute head/neck massages twice a week? Yes please! But I leave every single time with a headache, which turns into an excruciating migraine by that night. Pretty much the only time I get those really bad ones now are the days I go to P.T. Hmmm. Something wrong with this picture? Supposedly I should get used to it in time, but how many more times can I willingly go in there, knowing I'm in for a crapload of pain that night? I have to say, not many. Sigh.

Other than that not much to report. I promise to be back soon, blogging again. I can't promise I'll have anything interesting to say, but maybe you'll wanna read it anyway.

Dip

Hello. Long time. It's taken everything in me to drag myself to the computer to write this post but I'm trying to make myself do things I don't necessarily feel like doing so here I go.

I know that in life there are times when it seems you're on top of the world and others where you wish so much you didn't have to get out of bed. Ever. I know that it's supposed to be that way. I know this. Believe me, I've experienced my share of dips in the roller coaster. I'm always prepared for the next dip, always waiting for the bubble to burst. But I'm also always waiting to swing up out of that dip onto the next peak, to be on top of the world again, or even to just plateau to a nice, level happy medium. But what happens when the dip just keeps going? And going? And going........

I am trying. Every day I try. Every day I get out of bed thinking "today's the day. Today will be different. Today I will have energy. Today I will be motivated. Today I will feel useful, and happy, and worthwhile." I even go for a walk first thing in the morning, something I have never done before, not for this long anyway. I've been eating healthy, even losing weight. I've been cleaning my house, and keeping it cleaner than I ever have before. I've been doing hobbies, writing and decorating cakes like nobody's business. I've been keeping contact with the outside world via Facebook and friends. I've prayed. I've read my scriptures. I've started seeing my therapist again.

But every day all I want to do is crawl back in bed and sleep. And sleep some more. And I do. Every day.

It's just one of those dips. We all have them. And this is a big one for me.

I'm not posting this for your pity. Honestly, that's the last thing I want. Please don't ask me how I'm doing when you see me. It will only make me uncomfortable. I'm blogging about it so that I don't have to talk about it in person. This is my therapy, because I can only go to my therapist so often and I'm so much better with words when I don't have to say them. I know I'll swing up and out of this some day. I always do. Just send good thoughts my way. And maybe a prayer or two.

Wazzz Up...with me

I have nothing but time now all day long to sit and blog and yet here I am, laying in bed, blogging, at 1:30 am. I don't have much to say but it's been way too long since I blogged and I just thought I'd give you a quick rundown of my life at the present. Before I come back later with actual blog posts about actual exciting events and vacations and happenings this summer with actual--wait for it--pictures. I know, right?!

But not this post. No. This post will be lame. Lots of words, no pictures. Yeah. Blah. But if you have nothing better to be doing with your time right now, keep reading, because you and I both know that there have been no status update changes made since you were on Facebook five minutes ago.

> I just finished Mockingjay. I don't want to ruin anything for those who haven't read it yet, so if you wanna know my opinions about it, and believe me--I got lots--email me and we'll talk. Now I am done laying around reading all day as...

> I have entered Phase 2 of being a stay-at-home-mom: both kids at school all day, every day. For those of you who have heard me talk about it (sing giddily about it?) and are ready to punch me in the face, please believe me that I'm not trying to rub it in. I've just, well, anticipated this day for 9 years and I'm not gonna feel bad about it. I worked hard, paid my dues, sacrificed naps and showers and any sense of free time and it. was. hard. The hardest thing I've ever done. (yes, I'm aware it will get harder at some point.) But for right now can I just enjoy it? Enjoy this break that's been given me? I've earned it, and doggonnit I'm gonna enjoy it and not feel guilty about it! I am taking full advantage of this opportunity by...

> Walking each morning. I haven't exercised regularly in years and it feels fantastic! I walk with a good friend of mine and we talk and talk and I barely notice my blistering toes or bursting lungs as we go up the hill...I love every second of it. Finally, I am getting my body healthy, as per the advice of...

> My new neurologist. Wow. Polar opposite experience from the last one. I left his office hopeful, encouraged, and highly optimistic. He told me basically what I had already guessed about my body, specifically my head/migraines. To hear a doctor confirm what I already believed to be true was, well, a little euphoric. He put me on a preventative drug to stop the headaches before they start and gave me an abortive drug to stop a migraine in its tracks if I need to. But more importantly, he said I need to get healthy, lose the weight, and become physically active. AND he confirmed that I absolutely need to go to physical therapy because my neck is MESSED UP and is probably 80% of the cause of my headaches. Stupid stress. So, with my headaches under control, I should finally be able to...

> Write my book. Aaaggghhh!!! What began as one of the most exciting, wonderful moments of my life has since turned into stress, panic, doubt, and self-doubt. It started with an offer from my amazing cousin whom I absolutely adore who works at a publishing company. Together with her boss, they offered me a contract with them if I could have my finished manuscript to them by the end of the year, along with a little royalties advance. (!!!) I actually yelped when I read the offer. It is my lifelong dream come true. I'm not kidding. And it would work so perfectly! With both kids at school all day I had my days available to do nothing but write, write, write. But then reality hit. I began to wonder if I actually could finish my book in four months. Wonder turned to doubt, doubt turned to disbelief, disbelief turned to sheer panic. And there's only one way I cope with panic, and that is shut-down mode. Aaarrrggghhh!!!!! So frustrated. But I WILL not let this slip away from me. I'd be insane if I did and I'd hate myself forever. I WILL do this. I have to. (positive, motivational thoughts my way please!) So I've been avoiding my book and getting out my creative juices elsewhere...

> Cake Decorating classes! As of Thursday I am a Wilton Cake Decorating Courses graduate! I am all done, and it's completely bittersweet. On the one hand, I have learned all that they have to teach me until I can take some advanced classes. On the other hand, I will miss the classes! And I really thought I'd feel more qualified to start charging people but...no way. So not there yet. So if you need a cake for any reason, please let me know. I really need the practice but I just can't charge anyone yet. If you want a good cake for free and are understanding about the fact that it's a learning cake for me and won't be perfect, I'm your girl! Seriously! I need the practice!

I think that's about it for now. Again, it's 2:00 in the morning. I don't why I do this. Something's wrong with me, seriously. It'll be fun to see in the morning if this all made as much sense as it does in my brain right now. Soon I will do my summer recap post with pictures, and put pics of my cakes on here too.

And now I'm out.

Alone

No one's allowed inside my fort
I've built it strong and tall and true
There is no door of any sort
To let mere passersby come through

No drawbridge which to lower down
No rope or ladder which to drop
Cause in my fort I wear the crown
And it's my throne I sit atop.

And here within these walls I've built
I'm safe from all that hurts and scares
No wounds inflicted, no blood spilt
No unkind words that I must bear

And even though it's lonely here
Inside my fort, atop my throne
At least I'm safe, that much is clear:
You can't get hurt when you're alone.

Eclipse

SPOILERS.......SPOILERS.........SPOILERS...........SPOILERS............SPOILERS............SPOILERS


Grrr...these movies are so hard for me to review so I'm just gonna warn you now that you may hate everything I say.

I liked Eclipse more than I liked Twilight and less than I liked New Moon. I know, I know, I'm sure you thought Eclipse was the best one yet...everyone seems to think so. But not me. Why? I'm not entirely sure but I'll do my best to explain.

The main reason is the "feel" of the movie, which can be attributed primarily to the acting. I'm not saying it's bad acting. It's just...weird, and something about it completely rubs me the wrong way. A lot. Right from the very first scene with Bella and Edward sitting in the meadow talking and kissing. Even when they weren't kissing their mouths were a fraction of an inch apart and they just kept moving around and it was just. so. awkward. They seem soooo uncomfortable around each other, so unnatural. Yes, I understand that Edward is struggling to not eat her, but their relationship in the book is comfortable, natural, easy, at least by Eclipse. Not please-make-it-stop-before-I-jab-my-own-eyes-out. It seriously makes me think of my first boyfriend in middle school, when I would meet him in the hallway, trying desperately to think of anything to say to him while shuffling my feet and praying he wouldn't try to kiss me. You know it's really bad when my favorite parts of the movie were the comic relief moments (which, in all other movies, make me cringe).

The rest of the Cullens, while not quite as bad, are not far behind. We see a lot more of some of them, which means a lot more Jasper and his hair. Oh, the hair. Eclipse brings us a less-blonde Jasper with a lady wig. Because, you know, we weren't laughing at him enough before. The good news is that it seems like the more lines he had, the more normal he actually acted. So, that's a plus.

All of this leads me to why I have almost completely converted to Team Jacob. I love Taycob. (That's Jacob as played by Taylor Lautner) He is, in my humble opinion, the only easy thing in the movie to watch. And I don't just mean easy on the eyes, which, let's admit, he totally is. I mean he moves easily, he talks normally, he acts comfortable. He truly is Jacob--sunshine, healthy, easy. And, he now holds the title of delivering the best line in a movie, ever (to Edward): "Face it, I'm hotter than you." (I can't help but wonder if that wasn't more of a joke about the reaction to a buff Taylor Lautner in New Moon compared to pasty, scrawny Rob.)

Of course I wouldn't be a true Twi-hard if I didn't hate the changes that they made. I don't mind little changes that were necessary for the big screen. But I hate changes that don't seem to have any purpose behind them, and even more than that I hate changes that are so obviously for time's sake or transitioning from one thing to the next. I don't know if that makes any sense, but I understand what I mean completely. :) There were no less than three incredibly obvious ones in Eclipse, which knocked it down a few notches for me. And what the heck was the big idea with completely eliminating the epilogue?! I sat waiting for Jacob to get his wedding invitation in the mail all the way through the credits. Yup. The entire theater had emptied but I stayed, because I refused to accept that they just didn't put that in the movie. Losers.

But, being that same loyal Twi-hard, I had to appreciate the things they kept the same, especially little details that they totally didn't have to keep in there. The only one that comes to mind right now is (blushing) when Edward and Bella are going at it on the bed, just before Edward dutifully stops Bella from seducing him, he grabs her knee and hikes it up around his waist. Loved it. Also, they nailed the tent scene, which is really all I cared about anyway.

There are probably 55,000 other things I could (and would) say about the movie but I've probably filled you all with more negativity than you wanted to hear about it already so I will stop. Ironically enough, I can't wait to go see it again, if only to see the parts I loved again, but also because I'm pretty sure I'll like it better the second time around.

*Update* As predicted, it was MUCH better the second time. Much. Not that anything changed, just that I was prepared for the crappy parts and excited for the good parts.

Movie Queen Rating: Somewhere between PG (pretty good) and PG-13 (eh)

Movie Queen Rating The Second Time Around: PG (pretty good)