I feel like a few weeks ago a cyclone came by and picked me up. I keep waiting for it to drop. Still waiting...
My mind is full and spinning, like the cyclone. Sometimes my heart is heavy, weighed down by an excess of thoughts. If I'm lucky, for a few hours I can be distracted and push them to the far reaches of my mind. But they always come back. Life has a way of doing that. Maybe if I write about them, list them one by one, the cyclone will finally drop me. Maybe in the Bahamas. So here's what's been on my mind...
~ Diet. I sense the need to eat healthy is greater than ever, and every day is a struggle to start new. But every day I do just a little bit better. I guess that's something.
~ Illness. Someone I know was recently diagnosed with a brain tumor and I know many more who suffer from the evils of cancer. After reading this blog tonight, I am inspired by those who make an effort to help in any way they can. I hope I can do the same.
~ Friendship. This topic occupies most corners of my mind. I try, over and over again, to understand the complexities of friendship, to no avail. Usually I just have to stop and resign myself to the fact that I can only do the best I can do with the friends that I have, and be truly grateful for the people that love me for who I am, no matter what I do.
~ Money. No more barrels, no more scraping, please.
~ Kids. I knew I was due. After so many months of things being too good to be true, it was only a matter of time before the screaming, whining, arguing, fighting, talking back and disobeying began. This too shall pass.
~ Schedules. I've never had one so full and I don't know how to deal with it. On the plus side, I have been forced to stop taking naps (no time for those) and somehow still manage to get through the day.
~ Standards. Every day I think I know where I've set them, only to wonder if they aren't high enough. I wish I could better understand the guidance in "living in the world but not of the world." Everyone has their own line that they've drawn. I guess I'm just always trying to figure out where mine is.
~ Blogs. I do it too much, and still can't keep up. More and more I let them affect me too much and it's those times I think that I'm done. Yet here I am, clicking away on my keyboard.
~ Sleep. No naps = me exhausted come 9:00. I'm going to bed.